I Won't Be Far Away
by bitterberries
Summary: "It doesn't feel real. Sometimes its hard to snap back into reality and realize that you're still gone, and that you're not with me." / Inspired by the ending of Forrest Gump. / Warning: death,tragedy / Jerza


**Rating: M (death/tragedy)**

**Pairings: Jellal x Erza**

**Summary: "_It doesn't feel real. Sometimes its hard to snap back into reality and realize that you're still gone, and that you're not with me." _**

**Disclaimer: Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail and all of its characters.**

**You guys should listen to this as you read: Kanashiki Kako - Fairy Tail OST**

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**I Won't Be Far Away**

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It's at dawn when he comes. The peak of orange light starting to raise up grants him guidance as he travels, but the path is already implanted in his head. He already memorized it, so he doesn't use it at all. It's the same pattern everyday; he wakes up, makes breakfast for his daughter and Meredy, leaves a note on the dining table, and briefly gets ready before heading out to the nearby florist to buy a bouquet of sweet flowers for his wife.

Azure strands are blown back in flow with the cool crisp air of the morning. He trudges up the small hill and feels the dry grass depress beneath his shoes with every step, and through it all, he doesn't dare look at the sky, swirling in its random array of warm colors. The emerald hues are instead cast to the ground.

His grip on the heavy bouquet tightens when the terrain is level again.

Settling himself in front of the large tombstone, he shrugs off his coat and lays the bundle of flowers to the side. His eyes close as he takes in the fresh breeze around him; the smell of the watered roses he just purchased and the old ones that were there before him intoxicating his senses.

With a deep inhale followed by a long exhale, he opens them again.

"Hey baby," Jellal breathes, touching the gravestone with a shaky hand. His words come to a pause; it all wants to come out at the same time but he has to remember to control himself. His palm falls back limply at his side when he starts up again, eyes scanning over her name.

"So I stopped by that flower shop that you've always liked, you know, the one just a block away from our house? I got your favorites," he says, grabbing the bouquet and this time maneuvering it towards the middle front of the grave. "It was a great deal, as always."

His fingers fumble with a loose red rose petal.

This is routine. He starts the same way every time, and the only thing different is the day.

The way he talks throughout the hour is _incredible_ to him. They flood out of his mouth; the words come to him so easily and he ends up killing the time with such smooth conversation. As he finishes his current story, the corners of his mouth pull up slightly. "It turns out Meredy has a little crush on somebody from Lamia, and every time the others ask her about it, she starts getting angry and she threatens to drop a hoard of her swords on each and every one of them. Erik's been a walking first aid kit ever since," a soft chuckle escapes him as the memory vividly replays in his mind.

"If only you were here," he whispers quickly, altering his green optics to the side. "She would have vented to you, I'm sure."

For a while, he just sits there and contemplates his next announcement. _This day was different than the others_, after all. The small item in his pocket was aching to get out, and with a strangled breath he moves his palm to grab it out of his trousers. He doesn't look at the main part yet, but instead he flips the little sheet over and stares at the date scribbled over the backside.

And it's then that he starts to fall apart.

_May 9th of X800_

"It's her birthday today," Jellal smiles weakly, a little quiver gracing his lips. "She t-turns four… but you already knew that."

When he turns the item back over, a photo of a little girl is revealed.

"I took this yesterday…and do you know what she said to me?" There are tears in his eyes, but he doesn't move an inch to wipe it. His voice cracks as he utters out the answer.

"She asked i-if it was for you."

A sad, airy laugh mixed with a sob suddenly breaks out of him as he continues. "She said she wanted you to see it. She said sh-she wanted her mother to see her the day before her b-birthday… a-and when I said that this picture w-was for you, she just asks me if she looks p-pretty."

"…And I can just tell you right now that she l-looks _exactly like you _Erza," he whispers.

Just from saying her name, he feels a rising warmth.

"I-I asked her to look in the camera and sh-she just smiled at me with the biggest smile in the world." There's something that tugs at his heart as he stares at the photograph of their little girl, with her blue hair and piercing green eyes, wearing a purple summer dress. There's a plastic sword in her hands, and he easily blinks the blurriness in his vision away as a grin graces his features. "She was playing with the sword you made her… I-I don't think she ever puts it down, it's her f-favorite toy out of all the ones she h-h-has."

He sniffs loudly before lightly kissing the photograph. "She asks about you every single day. She loves you, she l-loves you just as much as I do even though she n-never got the chance to meet you... she always asks me…asks me h-how you were like… and all the same questions she already knows the answers to, because she just loves h-hearing about you and talking about you because she loves you, Erza. B-before I close the door in her bedroom at night, she always tells me, and you, that she does…" Jellal pays a glance back to the picture. His breathing starts to stagger profusely as he pulls out another photo from one of his pockets, this time it being of a youthful bride grinning brightly with her groom. The two photographs are side by side as the azure haired man scans it. He remembers the day clearly, as if it was just yesterday that he became married to the love of his life.

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_"Hey! Say cheese lovebirds!"_

_"But I'm eating cake," the redhead said, her mouth too busy chewing on a strawberry. "I haven't eaten all day."_

_"It'll just be real quick! C'mon, Jellal! Hug her or something," Lucy positioned the camera in front of her eyes. The said man rose up from his seat obediently and extended an arm out to the hungry bride. _

_"Fine," Erza muttered, quickly swallowing her food and grabbing a hold of her husband's held out hand. She walked around to stand in front of him while he wrapped his arms around her waist and laid his head on her shoulder. A pigmented flush was cast upon the requip mage's face as he did this. Her brown irises melted in a chocolate mirth filled warmth as she gazed at him._

_"What?" He asked, smiling._

_Turning away shyly, the woman only let a soft chuckle before directing her gaze to the camera._

_"Are you guys ready?" The blonde asked slowly, a knowing smirk plastered over her face. With beaming faces, the couple nodded a quick yes, and seconds later a large flash was produced._

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"She has your smile," he weeps, comparing the two pictures in front of him. He remembers how beautiful Erza was that day, with her perfectly curled scarlet locks, naturally made up face, and the gorgeous but elegant gown that defined each curve and edge of her slender body.

"She looks s-so much like you… every time I look at her, I see you."

Putting down the picture of their daughter under the bouquet of roses, his fingers then grasp the diamond wedding ring that is strung around his neck in a chain necklace. The image of his wife is held over his heart, his heartbeat thumping loudly against his palm, and in his ears. "E-every day, I make her breakfast, lunch, and dinner… sh-she likes strawberry cake, just like you did, y-you know?

"She's a-already practicing her magic, and it seems that your requip is b-becoming easier than what I do… e-every now and then, she changes into a set of clothes, o-only to come back a second later wearing a whole different outfit, and sometimes it's an outfit that's been missing for weeks," he verbalizes, tucking the picture away and bringing up a sleeve to try and wipe away his tears. "We a-also look at the stars every night before she goes to bed."

In an attempt to swallow the lump in his throat, he gulps and lets out a choked sob. "Y-You'd be so proud of her Erza..._I am_… I-I know you're watching o-over her, over us, and I know you're e-enjoying watching her grow up as much as I do."

At this point, he surrenders. Hot tears are streaming down his face and he can taste the salt dripping onto his tongue. It's been a while since he's cried like this, and it's only his heartbreaking sobs that can be heard throughout the cemetery. The only word to describe how he was feeling was _wishful_. He wishes he could see her again, he wishes he could hold her and kiss her and hug her like he used to, despite knowing that he can't.

She slipped away from his fingers when he least expected. She was gone, and the realization that she wasn't with him anymore still crushed him.

"Sometimes I feel like you're still here," he starts back up, putting a hand on the side of his face to rest against as his head drops. "_I-It doesn't feel real. _S-Sometimes it's hard to snap back into reality and realize that you're still gone, and that you're not with me."

Gasping loudly, his hands fall back to his side, and Jellal takes in a deep breath. Finally, gathering all of the strength that he could muster, he shifts his head upwards, facing the vibrant colors that he didn't have the courage to look at before.

He feels the cool wind hit his face in a refreshing sensation.

"I miss you Erza," he sighs shakily, immediately breaking out in a clear cry soon after. "I miss you, I love you so much."

After gazing up at the sky, swirling in a mixture of multiple shades of scarlet with flickers of beginning blues for what seems like decades, Jellal tears his sight away and averts it to the grave before him.

_Erza Scarlet Fernandes_

_S class mage of Fairy Tail_

_Loving wife, mother, & friend _

_X765 - May 10, X796_

"Well," he begins, grabbing his coat from the floor and using it to dry his face. He then stands up, exhaling a cloud of warmth into the bitter morning breeze. "I'm sorry…I-I can't stay for too long…It is Amber's birthday today, s-so I'm not going to keep anybody waiting… I'll be here tomorrow, with a new picture and new batch of red roses ready just for you."

Shrugging on his coat, his temperature skyrockets instantly, and suddenly he doesn't feel as cold as he did. Jellal lets a small, tearful smile caress his lips.

"If there's anything you need, I won't be far away."

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**notes: So what just happened, you ask? I honestly feel like this was a bit confusing, but I can explain.**

**So in this little fic, everyday at dawn, we have Jellal venture out to visit Erza, as in visit her grave. He does this everyday with a similar routine, but it's only on days like this (their daughter's birthday, the very day she passed away) that he cries to his hearts content. On her fourth birthday, he's talking to her grave about their daughter, how she's doing, and it also focuses on his feelings towards her untimely death and such. **

**Inspired by the ending scene of Forrest Gump. **

I used plenty of song inspiration for this, so in case you were wondering:

_Wish you were here - Avril Lavigne_

_Don't Worry Now_ _ - Britt Nicole_

_I Miss You - Avril Lavigne_

_When You're Gone - Avril Lavigne_

_Goodbye - Secondhand Serenad_e

_Never Stop - SafetySuit (WEDDING version)_

_It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday - Boyz2Men_

***RUNS AWAY***

**reviews are greatly appreciated.**

**Oh and yes! I am finishing jerza week, but I'm busy and a bit writers blocked atm.**


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